I wonder if I ama better talker than I am a writer, because when I talk and explain my ideas and opinions to people, it comes out sounding eloquent and clear, flowing with my thought processes to the exact place I wanted them to go. When I try to write this down though, I not only loose the flow and clarity of instantaneous thought, I lose the words that made it perfect in the first place.
My way of talking is unique. What I say is just how I say things. They say in exams that your first answer is most likely to be correct, so if you're not sure, don't rewrite your response. My immediate response to people is individual, clear, and reflective of how I feel.
I feel that I lose my individuality when I write. I read so much that I know exactly how things should sound. I use the words that I know 'work', with no thought to whether they are my own. I think into my hand, but my fingers translate my thoughts into generic terms with the goal of sounding 'good'. But what is 'good'? It isn't what I was thinking of at the start.
I feel that I often misrepresent things because I use the wrong words. The problem is, though, that those words 'work'; they just weren't mine. Who do they belong to? Probably a hundred different authors. I think that I'm in a position of having to learn to write things as I would say them, because I don't mis-represent in my talk. What I spontaneously say was just how I meant to say it. I think back at times with a new answer in mind for a person I was talking to, thinking "this would have been more of a 'me' thing to say", but the fact that I said what I said at the time makes the thing the 'me-est' thing I could have said. The first answer is more likely to be correct.